I have been counseling individuals, couples, and families in various capacities since 2004. As a California BBS licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with a masters degree in Pastoral Care and Counseling, I strive to effectively integrate Catholic and Christian teaching with counseling and psychotherapy. I have extensive training in theology and religious studies. This contributes to a greater awareness of the close relationship that exists between happiness and a healthy spiritual life. In therapy I place great importance on the value of the human person.

“I believe the greatest gift I can conceive of having from anyone is to be seen, heard, understood, and touched by them.  The greatest gift I can give is to see, hear, understand and touch another person.  When this is done, I feel contact has been made.” (Virginia Satir, 1916-1988, Psychotherapist).

I am the one who listens. In my work as a therapist, listening is the art, the story is the palette, and the final product is the changed person. When one is accurately listening, one takes the humble stance that what they know, think, believe, accept, and feel becomes subordinate to the story being told and re-experienced by the other person. Listening, therefore, is an act of love. “If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge…but have not love, I am nothing.” (1Cor 13:2). A successful therapist is not one with multiple licenses and a litany of letters after their name. The successful therapist is one who has endured the struggles and challenges in their own life and has come to accept who they are in spite of life’s many trials. This person knows what it means to be human and can love and accept others in all their human splendor. Together, I will listen to your journey, delving into the hidden depths that lurk beneath the iceberg that everyone else sees.

The licensing process for therapists requires involvement in a minimum of 3000 hours of face-to-face contact with clients under clinical supervision before we can practice privately. For this reason I have spent literally thousands of hours working in various capacities to widen the breadth and increase depth of my skills. I have worked since 2007 as a mental health clinician in various alcohol and substance abuse treatment settings helping adults, adolescents, and their families overcome the grip of addiction. I have also worked extensively with underprivileged pregnant and parenting adolescents with a history of substance use helping them get their lives back on track. Prior to that, I have served as a hospital chaplain, a pastoral counselor at a Catholic parish, and a bereavement counselor for a north county hospice. These experiences helped to shape the person I am today, and the therapist that will be working with you.

Training

As mentioned earlier, my therapeutic approach is person-centered and can be best described as “psychodynamic.” No, you will not be lying on a couch staring at the ceiling, talking at length about your childhood while I toss out questions. Psychodynamic therapy is partly concerned with how your past is affecting your present. Yes, your childhood is important because those experiences of the past shape the person you are today, especially those events that are emotionally very strong. We are also very interested in your family history and how you fit within that family dynamic. The truth is no one grows up in a vacuum. People grow up in families, neighborhoods, and communities. For this reason, the authorities of peoples’ lives (parents, step-parents, foster parents, relatives, family friends, teachers, loved ones, and so on) are highly influential in a person’s development and it’s important to become aware of how those authorities influenced you. Very often a correlation exists between past events and relationships and current problems.

Psychodynamic therapy is also interested in how your future may be impacted by your present. This is especially relevant in working with those in substance use recovery. The consideration here is the prevention of relapse or other legal, familial, or employment concerns before they become problems. We will explore your current situation and plan ways to make a better future without relying on previous coping techniques that may have previously caused trouble (e.g. substance use, arguing, manipulation, etc.).

When working in the psychodynamic approach, we take the past and the future and bring it into the present and try to bring to awareness how those events are affecting you here and now.

Specific areas where I can help you in treatment are:
 Overcoming resentment and discovering peace through forgiveness
     Have you ever been angered or offended to the extent that you just can’t
     let go of the hurt? Have your efforts to process your feelings been met with
     an admonition to move on? I can teach you to learn to forgive so you can
     enjoy a life of peace.

 Addiction recovery
     Trained in the 12-step model, addiction recovery is more than merely not
     using anymore. It is a massive undertaking of self-discovery and spiritual
     growth. Counseling can be a big source of support.

 Adolescent Counseling
     A child’s newly discovered ability to reason can challenge a parent. Their
     mind is in its most adaptable state and creative in its thinking, but lacks the
     wisdom of experience. Sometimes an unbiased, outside view of a situation
     can help an adolescent and a parent approach things differently.

 Pre-Marriage Preparation
     Pre-marriage preparation is about the single person learning about and
     preparing for a life in a committed relationship. You DON’T have to be
     dating or in a relationship to receive pre-marriage preparation. You DO
     have to be ready to learn more about yourself and how you believe a
     committed relationship will serve you.

  Family Counseling
     Addiction, mental illness, or troublesome issue in one family member affects
     the entire family unit. Family cohesion can be strengthened when every
     member understands the experience of the others.

  Finding meaning and purpose in life
     Why am I here? What should I do with my life? What is God’s plan for me?
     Answers to these questions can lead to a life of peace and joy.

 Career change help
     Can a person with years of experience in a particular career change paths
     at mid-life? How would this be achieved? How might others be affected by
     this change? We can explore this here.

  Spiritual Direction
     How is God calling me to live my life? What can I do when I do not feel
     spiritually fulfilled? Am I truly engaged in God’s plan? Spiritual direction can
     give your faith life a shot in the arm.

  Individual Counseling
     Whatever you decide to bring into session will be discussed.

Free initial consultation! I am aware that choosing a therapist is a very personal decision, given that you are disclosing your most intimate self to a veritable stranger. I believe in first impressions and the ability of one person sizing up another and deciding if they like an individual in the first few seconds. For these reasons, I offer a free 30-minute consultation to meet me in person, see if there is a connection, ask questions, and determine if I can meet your needs and help achieve your goals. It you decide it’s a match, then we can go from there. I look forward to meeting you!

Education
 Licensed Marriage and Family Counselor,
     MFC 50774, California Board of Behavioral Sciences.
 Master’s degree, Marriage & Family Therapy,
     Alliant International University, 2007
 Master’s degree, Pastoral Care & Counseling,
     University of San Diego, 2005
 Academic education in Alcohol and Other Drug Studies,
     San Diego City College, 2010. Certificate pending completion of internship.
 Graduate-level theology and religious studies,
     St. John’s Seminary, Camarillo, CA 2000-2002
 Undergraduate theology and religious studies,
     University of San Diego, 1999-2000

Over the years, therapy has afforded me the opportunity to teach others both in practice and in public. I derive great satisfaction sharing what I learn through the workshops I develop and professionally present. One workshop I offer is called Forgiveness: A Road Map to Peace at which I help participants learn how the offenses of others become our grievances, why they are grievances to us, and how to overcome these grievances so we can resume the positive intention that we were originally striving to achieve before being thwarted by the other’s offense. I also frequently speak on How to Form Healthy Intimate Relationships. In this workshop, I teach both married and unmarried participants how people grow in closeness in both friendship and in romantic relationships. I further teach participants practical techniques that will enable them to take the intimacy of their existing relationships to a new level of connectedness, including their relationship with God. Please check the FCS Event Calendar often, or send me an e-mail to find out when these workshops will be available for your education and personal growth.


Professional Organizations
 Member of the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists
     (CAMFT)
 Registered Student, California Association of Alcohol and Drug Abuse
     Counselors (CAADAC), RS6347

Contact:
rdbuchmann@gmail.com
619-858-3105 x151